From Heartbreak, Mourning, Loss. Volume One, Detach or Die
Too big to fail
It is the first time in my life that I believe in destiny. Laura and I are destined for each other. Our love is so big it cannot fail. She gives me everything that I came on this earth to receive. She is having an affair with a guy she met during a recent business trip to Europe. She came back from that trip five days ago, and I felt something was off the minute I picked her up at the airport. That evening, I was eager to reconnect and as soon as we got home I wanted to make love. Although we went through the motions of lovemaking, she was distant, aloof. The whole weekend was bizarre; Laura was nice but silent, sweet in a cold, distant sort of way. On Monday, when she left for work, my first thought was that she had met someone on that business trip to London. I could not help committing the indiscretion of opening her computer and reading her emails. She must have forgotten that I know her password, or maybe she just could not imagine how revealing was her sudden sexual coolness.
The emails revealed it all: my rival is Jeremy, whom I know, because we both train at the same gym. I read the email she sent him last night when I was in the shower, just before we made love. I also saw the pictures of their romance in London. It is so naïve, it can’t be serious: love after a brief romantic escapade? I can forgive a summer fling! It is not a pleasant thing, but affairs happen. Laura would like to be the center of my universe, the one and only, and when my daughters are around, she feels unimportant. I have supported Laura through periods of unemployment, lack of resources; I have been on her side, proving my love with acts of love, not just sweet words. And now, she falls for Jeremy’s promises? I want to wake her up from her girlish illusions. I know Jeremy. He is indeed a nice guy, but he too has a history. Jeremy is the father of a baby boy. For now, that baby is just a sweet little creature, and Laura writes about this baby as if it were a cute house pet. She has no idea that all adorable kids eventually turn into impossible teens, like my girls now are. I trust the pink bubble will burst. She’ll come to see that my love is truer than Jeremy’s.
